Tears of Strength: It's Okay To Be Emotional, Black Women
By: Tasha Hough
I know that as a black woman I'm supposed to just naturally handle things differently than other women. I'm supposed to be able to take on more for much less. I'm supposed to never show fear, sadness, or "weakness" as a black woman. I'm just supposed to take whatever the world gives me and just deal with it because I have "shit to do". The black woman has ALWAYS been looked down on (then copied), degraded, and was damn near born with a to-do list, but I can't cry? I guess that makes sense and I'm proud to have that "tougher than nails" mentality just naturally embedded in my DNA *rolls eyes*.
*SPOILER ALERT* BLACK WOMEN NEED TO CRY TOO.
(crying can be literally or figuratively ... just RELEASE is my point)
I think because of the image the world has placed on crying (and black people overall), people tend to think that black women aren't supposed to let it out.
My question is ... what am I holding on to it, whatever IT is, for?
Better yet, we aren't supposed to have ANY emotion and the ones we are "allowed" to have usually have a negative image associated with them. For instance, if a black woman doesn't like the bullshit placed on them at the moment, decides to speak up about it, she's coined as loud, arrogant, and boisterous forever. If a black woman happens to be upset for a moment even if she is usually in good spirits, suddenly she's the angry black woman. If a black woman is genuinely happy, she must be high, or drunk because there is absolutely NO possible way a black woman can be happy JUST BECAUSE. What is she happy about right? If a black woman cries because, well that's what most humans do, she's seen as weak. **rolls eyes even harder**
>> SEE ALSO: A Dream Deferred, A Purpose to be Fulfilled
In my humble opinion, I think that the black community has to find a way to break away from the stereotype of what's considered "strong" and take their mental health a little more seriously. It takes more than just moving past things and getting to the shit we have to do. Yes, I have shit to do as well, but life is rough so sometimes a good ol ugly cry is exactly what is needed to PROPERLY move forward in life.
As a community, we have to find a way to let people know that it is very much so okay to be emotional. It is very much so okay to feel. We think having actual feelings and accepting those feelings is a bad thing. Accept however you feel, release those feelings, dust yourself off and grow from whatever it is so you can do better.
We love to shut down as well as run away from what's really going on with ourselves because we feel like we always have a task at hand. Make your next task YOU. Stop getting caught up in your drudgery routine of trying to handle it all, all at once, without even thinking about your well being; mind, body and soul. You can NOT pour from an empty glass. Take time to really clear your head somehow and get in the habit of unwinding (in a healthy ways) often.
Trust me, becoming a slave to your routine hurts you and your surroundings. In the end, it does no one any good. It is okay to take care of yourself and THEN get to the shit you have to do.
You got this.