Interracial Dating: 4 Questions Strangers Ask About My Interracial Relationship
By Abina George
I am a black woman strewn in a sea of confusion. Amidst America’s race wars and growing conflict, I find myself questioning myself and where I stand. Strangers try to make sense of my decision of dating outside my race and their questioning has led me to have questions about myself.
I began dating a white-passing person of color years ago. I had the usual concerns. Are we a good match? Do we share the same beliefs and future goal? But of course, race-related questions circulated through my head. Will this person understand my culture? Is he accepting and wholly willing to participate in my culture? Are there any prejudices I should know about?
After all of these questions, that fact that he was a different race never bothered me. Society likes to place barriers to anything and everything. If someone is willing to become a member of my family and treat us all with much-deserved respect, why should race be an issue?
You are diluting the bloodline.
There isn’t a person in modern society that has a perfect bloodline. In a country where we were taught to hold the one drop rule as king, being Black is more than a percentage of DNA, it’s the culture we’ve passed down for generations.
You are trying to produce mixed race kids.
Since I am dating someone from a different ethnicity, our kids most likely will look mixed. This is not preferred by any means. A healthy child, which so many are deprived of, is the preferred outcome. Suppose my children are darker than one would ever imagine? I will be blessed and as thankful as one could be. And if they are light? We will be equally as blessed and grateful.
You must despise your own race.
I love my race and our history and culture run through my veins. My children will likewise grow up in the culture and learn to be a voice for our community. If they have light-skinned privilege, they will be taught to speak up in support of the diaspora. It just so happens that my choice of partner does not look like me, but we share the same values.
You think white men are better.
This is an abhorrent lie that is spread through the media. Dating a white man is thought of as a step up from one’s race in every story. There is nothing wrong with Black men nor do I have an aversion to them. Black men are also God’s beautiful creation. It just so happens I’m dating a “white” guy.
In the end, we are two souls, bound by like minds. We picked each other, not because of race, but because of similar character and personalities. The concerns of others won’t stop of from being our best selves and growing with one another.